Stress Diet

This diet is designed to help you cope with the stress that builds up during the day.

• Breakfast
  1/2 grapefruit
  1 slice whole wheat toast - dry
  8 oz skim milk
  
  
• Lunch
  4 oz lean broiled chicken breast
  1 cup steamed spinach
  1 cup herb tea
  1 Oreo cookie
  
  
• Midafternoon Snack
  Rest of the Oreos in the package
  2 pints of Rocky Road ice cream
  1 jar hot fudge sauce
  nuts, cherries, whipped cream
  
  
• Dinner
  2 loaves garlic bread with cheese
  large sausage, mushroom and cheese pizza
  4 cans or 1 large pitcher of beer
  3 Milky Way or Snickers candy bars
  
  
• Late Evening News
  entire frozen cheesecake eaten directly from freezer

Rules For This Diet

• If you eat something, and no one else sees you eat it, it has no calories.
• When drinking a diet soda while eating a candy bar, the calories in the candy bar are canceled by the diet soda.
• When you eat with someone else, calories don't count as long as you don't eat more than they do.
• Foods used for medicinal purposes *never* count. Example: hot chocolate, brandy, toast and Sara Lee cheesecake.
• If you fatten up everyone else around you, then you look thinner.
• Movie-related foods do not have calories because they are part of the entertainment package and not part of one's personal fuel.
  Example: Milk Duds, buttered popcorn, Junior Mints and Tootsie Rolls.
• Cookie pieces contain no calories. The process of breaking the cookie causes calorie leakage.
• If you are in the process of preparing something, foods licked off knives and spoons have no calories.
  Examples: peanut butter on a knife and ice cream on a spoon.
• Foods of the same color have the same number of calories.
  Examples: green salad and Key Lime pie, mushrooms and white chocolate. Note: chocolate is a universal color and may be substituted for any other.