Ingredients:

  Amount  Measure       Ingredient -- Preparation Method
--------  ------------  --------------------------------
  32      ounces        cheap ketchup
     2/3  cup           apple cider vinegar
   1      cup           sugar
   1      stick         margarine
   1      cup           lemon juice
   2      teaspoons     black pepper
   2      tablespoons   crushed red pepper -- (red pepper flakes)

Preparation:

Put in a pot and bring to a boil. Keeps for weeks (months even) in the refrigerator. Good stuff.